* Also published earlier here.
Tag Archives: Freedom
Short and possibly repetitive, it looks like the rest of Reverb10 is going to be. After all, I guess how many introspective questions can there be for an aspiring writer?
December 18 – Try.
What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it?
(Author: Kaileen Elise)
I’ve wanted to live in my own place for years now. I first tried it five years back, a little after I had finished my education and started working. My office was clean across town, took about 90 minutes to commute to and another 90 back home at the end of the day. Most of my colleagues were from out of town and rented flats close to office. I figured out an arrangement with a colleague who I got along with. We even went looking for places together and found a few we liked. And then I broke the news to my family. It was a mess.
In sum, it didn’t work out and resulted in my spending more and more time in commuting and m office hours getting extended too which meant I had practically no time or energy left to do anything else. I didn’t really spend much time in the house either and I hated feeling like a prisoner trapped between four walls, only exchanging one controlled environment for another at the start and then the end of each day.
Five years later, things have changed in more ways than one. The financial implications of moving out are scary. On the other hand, it looks a lot more possible now than it ever was. I’ve crossed the magical 30 mark and hopefully laid to rest notions of my whole life being within the largely male-dominated control of other people.
I am a neat person though I don’t know how tidy I’ll be able to keep my own house. I’m generally well-organized, reasonably independent but I don’t know how self-sufficient I’ll be in reality. I’d love to find out. Maybe next year will be it.
Very quickly, the next Reverb10 prompt:
December 14 – Appreciate
What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?
(Author: Victoria Klein)
Freedom! Freedom from schedules, from having to be nice to people I think are lower on the evolution scale than amoeba only because it’s ‘professional’, freedom from having to answer to the very constrained, tight-fitting notion of what a good Tamilian girl should be like. This has been a year of breaking ground and breaking barriers. It’s been a year of upheavals and fights and anger and tears. But it has been a year of breaking free.
I appreciate it by enjoying every guilt-free, let-it-hit-me minute of it. From reading to singing to cooking to eating what I like, when I like to dressing as madly as I care to going out with whoever I want to, it’s a heady ride. The way to appreciate wings is by flying. The only way to pay for a good moment is to enjoy it. And I’m jolly well doing it all!
December 13 – Action
When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?
(Author: Scott Belsky)
I’m full of ideas. I’m IdeaSmith, after all (duh..). Actions? No, I’m not too bad in that areas either (sure, hate me, I’m wonderful!). It’s the sustaining them that I find difficult (okay, are you happy now?).
Lists have been my personal penicillin, wheel-style revelation. They help me keep my harum-scarum self organized. They remind of things that tend to slip out. And they’re like the lovely security deposit of ideas I have when I’m running dry. So the answer is, when I have an idea, I usually make a list (haven’t you noticed even this exercise is in a list?). I break the idea into broad zones/aspects, I detail tasks, I note down people to be connected with and what I need from them. List-making is usually an exhaustive exercise but it has the wonderful gift of making everything and anything seem manageable.
Oh, I forgot to add – crossing off things on the list is an integral part of enjoyment of the list. And that’s done and as short as I can get on the first try!
In the midst of a crowd
And imprisoned behind the bars of indifference
You still reached out your heart to me
Through the tiny windows of your eyes
And in that look, that one look,
I caught hold,
swearing I wouldn’t let go
Till I’d traced it to its source
At the other end of that glance,
What I found,
Tied me to you
But know this,
My memories of freedom come with me
And someday they’ll be yours too
And till then, the dream of wings will carry me out
You with me.
Because, like I said,
I won’t let go
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose
Or perhaps, nothing more to want
When the world is turning on schedule,
And you find yourself standing, apart, detached, watching
That’s when you look at yourself
And realize that your sense of identity
Is as fluid and fleeting as the rest of the world
Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.
Ever wondered what its like to jump off the edge of a cliff and then discover there’s no gravity? Ask me…I’m discovering it right this instant.
Yesterday I went for a walk on the beach. The sky looks darker near the sea and the waves melt into it so you don’t see a horizon…its like the sky itself is coming at you in gentle, swishing moves. I watched the half moon for so long, that the walkers started to stare at me. I couldn’t help it…the stars were twinkling and the silver moon glowing a brilliant ice….it was like the sky was smiling back at me.
I saw a sand castle. Someone (adult or child?)had laboriously loaded sand into buckets, shaped and smoothed the sides and painstakingly picked out towers and dug a moat around for safety. I saw the mind of someone who wasn’t there.
A few feet away, wet marigold garlands were lying in the sand. Somewhere, ashes that used to be someone, were drifting to the bottom of the ocean. And somewhere else, someone was missing somebody, someone was counting money and someone was lying wide-awake. I heard the tears of eyes that I couldn’t see.
Across the universe, children, adults, animals, stones, stars and trees are sending messages out. I’m picking them up, I’m tuned in…I’m right here.