Agni


I woke up half an hour ago with not a coherent thought except to enjoy a stress-free Monday at home after heavenaloneknows how long. Fifteen minutes back I walked into the kitchen to make my breakfast. I put the saucepan to boil and busied myself taking out tea leaves, honey and biscuits. My grandmother had come into the kitchen to talk to me so I turned when on the wall behind her I suddenly saw a blazing light where the dull grey shadows of the window behind me should have been. I turned back to find the gas range had caught fire. Not just the gas-ring under the saucepan but the knob below it too. 

I always thought I was calm in a crisis but the only thought I had was,

This can’t be happening. That knob isn’t made of flammable material, how can it be burning? This cannot be happening.

My grandmother with more presence of mind, but less mobility had already recovered and was directing,

Switch it off!

But how? I wondered. I couldn’t reach into the flames to turn the burner off. I had a vague memory of a fire extinguisher in our house but no clue where it was kept. And then random impressions of the fire-safety brochures that used to lie around the house. When I died, would anyone remember that I was the grand-daughter of the Chief of Fire Safety, New Delhi? Would anyone even know that when he was specially requested to extend his tenure for six months to organise a conference of fire protection teams around the world, he designed an invitation inscribed with the following words from the Vedas,

O Agni,
Be thee kind to us,
Be our friend and our guide
And keep us safe

This was topped by the picture of a baby with a wide, sunny smile. That child of course, was his much beloved grandchild – me.

Such were the thoughts that ran through my head as I stood and watched the kitchen cooking range catch fire. People who describe others as ‘frozen in shock’ don’t know what they’re talking about. I was perfectly mobile, my mind was racing with irrelevant thoughts.

I briefly considered grabbing the stick that we used to hang up clothes, to prod the knob shut but realized just in time that it was wood. I did manage to turn the fan on at full speed and holler my grandmother into going back to the hall. The kitchen tongs, made of metal would have been useful but they were hanging just next to the cooking range.

Finally I just ran next door to find my neighbor’s father. Neither he nor his wife were home, the only two ‘adults’ on the floor but his daughter followed me back into the house, asking what the matter was. I had come running back to stand and stare at the fire. Suddenly a man was standing next to me, asking,

Kya hua?

All I could say was

Aag laga hai. Kitchen mein aag laga hai.

(Fire. There’s a fire in the kitchen.)

He strode in and turned the gas cylinder shut. Then, as the knob was still burning, he just blew it out. Then he turned at me, smiled and said,

Leakage tha. Valve kharab hua tha. Saare building mein fael jaata tha.

(It was a leakage. The valve is faulty. It would have spread to the entire building)

It turns out that he was the gas service man, visiting next door and was walking out at that exact moment that I knocked on my neighbor’s door.

That in sum, is the story of this morning. My mother wasn’t home and neither was dad.

I don’t know what I should think or feel. I opened up the kitchen windows and asked my grandmother to stay in the hall, watching TV as she had been. And I lay down on my bed in my own room. It is too big a coincidence for me to digest, that a gas serviceman was next door at just the exact time there was a fire in my own house. What does it all mean? Was it divine intervention? And if it was, why was there a fire in the first place for me to be saved from?

If it is one of those ‘feel grateful for what you have’ kind of lessons I’m meant to have from life, it isn’t working. I am not feeling grateful or happy or anything at all. All I feel is a cold, hard knot of something that feels like anger. I don’t know what I have to be angry about or who.

I guess I’m writing this down so that I can take it out and examine it later. Nothing makes sense.

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10 thoughts on “Agni

  1. Rada June 29, 2009 at 15:59 Reply

    Oh! Scary!

    Must have shaken you up for sure!
    .-= Rada´s last blog ..A Barman in Galle =-.

    Like

  2. a traveller... June 29, 2009 at 16:48 Reply

    Three years ago, my 16-year old brother stayed home school due to fever and a bad cold – missing an exam for the first time in his life. That afternoon, with just mum and him at home, the electric chimney in the kitchen caught fire. Luckily, he managed to keep his head and went into the smoke-filled kitchen to switch off first the cylinder, then the electric meter of the house.
    If he hadn’t stayed home, if he hadn’t kept his head, I don’t know what would have happened that day. So no, I don’t know if it’s “divine intervention” but luck was definitely in our favour that day.

    I’m so glad you’re ok.

    Like

  3. iyer studies June 29, 2009 at 16:59 Reply

    good to know you’re safe without any casualties to you or the house…
    .-= iyer studies´s last blog ..IPL 3.0 =-.

    Like

  4. Prasoon June 29, 2009 at 18:44 Reply

    That coincidence does make me smile. Someone is there watching it makes me feel. Good to know that all’s well.

    Like

  5. Arpz June 29, 2009 at 18:53 Reply

    okay, Im delurking now …

    know what? 🙂 just let the incident be. By delving really deep … you might be making connections that dont even exist. So relax, you have been through an experience that has jolted you, so just relax 🙂

    And oh, one more thing, maybe this happened just so that you know that you need to be more “in the moment” 🙂
    .-= Arpz´s last blog ..why get married and etcetra =-.

    Like

  6. Arpz June 29, 2009 at 18:54 Reply

    oh! reading my comment again, makes it look like I sound really condescending, but really, Im not! no offence meant! I just wrote it, like I would talk to a really good friend of mine if she had narrated this to me, but I guess on a public forum to an anon person, it doesnt come out friendly … but really, no offence meant 🙂
    .-= Arpz´s last blog ..why get married and etcetra =-.

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  7. PS June 29, 2009 at 21:25 Reply

    thank god you are ok..

    Everytime an incident like this happens, we will, as humans, always delve into how some coincidence played out in our favor, and if it hadn’t how much worse things could have been. When my house was robbed, we thanked our starts that I hadn’t been alone at home, or my Mom, else the guy would have raped and killed, as his intention was.. My point here is, such incidents merely show us how things could be worse, and they weren’t that bad, because we were lucky the stars were aligned in our favor!

    Dont be angry, at yourself, the gas authorities, or old/faulty instruments in the house.. Just be happy that you learned something out of this.. which I am sure you did!! *hug*
    .-= PS´s last blog ..How awesome are we? =-.

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  8. rakhi June 29, 2009 at 23:25 Reply

    So glad to know that everybody and everything is alright. Hope the shock eases up soon.

    Like

  9. Aniket Thakkar June 30, 2009 at 00:55 Reply

    You can keep thinking over it trying to find a larger meaning. Me, I just believe shit happens.

    Am glad you are safe and soun… erm… okay am glad you are just safe. 😀 😀

    Take care.
    .-= Aniket Thakkar´s last blog ..FOUR POINT GreatOne =-.

    Like

  10. Kalpana June 30, 2009 at 20:06 Reply

    Hugs. Hugs. Hugs. It will unravel in its own time. Another hug.
    .-= Kalpana´s last blog ..Stigma? Revelation? =-.

    Like

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